Work Banter with SI Dredd

[Dredd]

So... Today, I have to work a 9 hour day with a half hour lunch break and I only have about 2 hours worth of work to do because my boss 'forgot' to sign a contract with the Solicitors we use...

SOMEONE ENTERTAIN ME PLZ

Thanks x

 

[Tommy Vapour]

Try to do this with your hands. I have recently learned to do it, and it is not even that hard. By the way that isn't my hand. I wish I could entertain you more...



https://gyazo.com/d2b743c3fbd72d3340463249f1f7829e

 

[Dredd]

Try to do this with your hands. I have recently learned to do it, and it is not even that hard. By the way that isn't my hand. I wish I could entertain you more...

View attachment 2002

https://gyazo.com/d2b743c3fbd72d3340463249f1f7829e

I would, but then my bosses might notice that I'm sat doing absolutely nothing of note. I'm typing non stop to give the illusion of hard work you see. 

(Not just a pretty face)

 

[Tommy Vapour]

I'm typing non stop to give the illusion of hard work you see.

That's what I do all the time.

 

[Weasley Wells]

Its easy you see. All you have to do is enter a twitch stream and be active in the chat so it seems as you are working but you are actually chatting with people, you could also just respond to every single post on the forums.

 

[SGT Owen]

Do some super top secret popo work

 

[Vaffla]

I could use a hand mapping the performance variants between MySQL, PostgreSQL and Percona for running over the indexing speeds of UUIDs versus full-integers and short integers, then mapping those against some benchmarks of read/write mixes?

 

[Mystic_]

I could use a hand mapping the performance variants between MySQL, PostgreSQL and Percona for running over the indexing speeds of UUIDs versus full-integers and short integers, then mapping those against some benchmarks of read/write mixes?

Could we have that in English?

 

[Washington]

I could use a hand mapping the performance variants between MySQL, PostgreSQL and Percona for running over the indexing speeds of UUIDs versus full-integers and short integers, then mapping those against some benchmarks of read/write mixes?

Vaffla trying to sound smart again

 

[Quinn]

I could use a hand mapping the performance variants between MySQL, PostgreSQL and Percona for running over the indexing speeds of UUIDs versus full-integers and short integers, then mapping those against some benchmarks of read/write mixes?

Always trying to sound smart, he really just copies and pastes his code from w3schools.

 

[Dredd]

Its easy you see. All you have to do is enter a twitch stream and be active in the chat so it seems as you are working but you are actually chatting with people, you could also just respond to every single post on the forums.

I was going for the every post thing, but @Axolotl got scared and told me off

Could we have that in English?

"MANS GOT PEAS INIT"

 

[Smith and Jones]

Tough life, Dredd...

I assume you have read my blog, otherwise there's 15 mins of stuff there for you!

Alternatively, answer this without using google:

What can travel around the world while staying in a corner?

 

[Vaffla]

Always trying to sound smart, he really just copies and pastes his code from w3schools.

Nah, I'm next level, I use Yahoo Answers.

 

[Dredd]

Tough life, Dredd...

I assume you have read my blog, otherwise there's 15 mins of stuff there for you!

Alternatively, answer this without using google:

What can travel around the world while staying in a corner?

You know, I haven't yet! I'm going to read it after my lunch

God I wish Waltychops was still here to help with the Riddle...

 

[Walt]

A STAMP. ITS A STAMP

 

[Dredd]

It's a stamp!

 

[Smith and Jones]

lol well done dredd, I'm convinced you solved that all on your own!

 

[DemonPuppy]

Sun, aint it?

 

[Dredd]

I'm a man of great resource xD