Courtesy of poemforyoursprog on reddit!
'Afternoon, me tasty crumpet -
Wanna shag, you sexy strumpet?
Shake your arse, m'lady, linger -
Only joking, cheeky minger!
'Heard about the bleedin' brexit?
Bugger me, an awful exit!
Total bunch of slags and plonkers -
Dozy wankers, bloody...